Monday, June 26, 2006

Life..Mystic Ecstacy (Contd.)

As a follow up to my last blog....
I have been thinking more about "Life" and the big scheme of things.
Two big 'truths' of life karma vs. destiny.
Look at the two..from one viewpoint they seem hand in hand and from another they seem contradictory to each other. If everything is pre-destined then the "karma" philosophy doesnt make sense, because then your very "actions" are not really in your control. That beats the whole "Karmanyevaadhikaraste maa phaleshu kadaachana.." - the essence of the BhagavadGita. Because if you never have control over your actions in reality and you will end up doing exactly what you should, be it right or wrong, then the whole "Arjuna dilemna" situation becomes a farce. Would God really want us to live in such a farce..?!
What do I think..?..hmm....again I dont have one right answer in my head but I can make a guess.
My guess is that Karma and Destiny are both true as a package together, not as individual entities.
Destiny: A very high level definition of how things will work.
Karma : A more day to day method of defining things at the granular level.
To elaborate more there might be a pre-defined grand scheme of things..the ice age, the dinosaurs, the meteor strikes, volcanoes etc. But there are many phenomenon that arise from man's "karma" (foolish karma in this case) like earthquakes caused by dams and reservoirs or other man-created high pressure zones, climatic disruption caused by pollution, hurricanes, tidal waves and other manifestations of nature's fury in response to man's foolish doings or karma!
This is still at a higher level, where the actions of a specific group of individuals affects the entire planet or even the universe at large. At a more day to day level, our own day to day doings and un-doings are I guess very much in control. We too have a destiny governing us but my guess is that it is not set in stone, instead there is room for us to steer our destiny by virtue of our actions or "karma". Thus life to us becomes more meaningful and gives us a sense and purpose of being. We always have God to fall back on..to ask for help..to vent our woes to. But as long as we are doing the "right" things and have our "karma" justified, we can rest assured.

Now why do I keep saying "God". Why do I keep referring to God as "he". Am I one of those believers in male-supremacy even when it comes to deities?! Well, those who know me might say a maybe for the deities part, but the male-supremacy part they would surely say "No! Thats not her!". That is quite right..I just use 'he' as a generic pronoun not really gender specific. As far as God..I believe there is a supreme governing power for this whole universe. There is a force we can never defy. There is one single governing entity which is there for us to take care of and get taken care of in return..call it nature, call it God, give it any name you want. I firmly believe in that one single all powerful entity!! I bow to that power. I call it God..Shakti in Hinduism..Want to give it a gender? Well, here you go, both nature and Shakti are referred to in the feminine. (Should I be honest and add that this to me is a secret feeling of gratification ;D For those of you familiar with the Da Vinci Code, it is the Sacred Feminine, the supreme power!)

Tuesday, June 20, 2006

Life..Mystic Ecstacy

Life is not easy..the more I go through it the more I begin to feel less is in my complete control. Again see, I say "complete" control, meaning I still want to believe that there is something atleast in my control. Even if it is partly so! It is hard to relinquish control and accept it as an eventuality.

But this is the irony of life. God creates this whole stage for us. He has a script in place and we act upon it. We have villains, we have heroes, we have sorrow, we have happiness, tragedy, comedy, boredom, fun, everything is woven into the play. It is evenly balanced too distributed across lives, ages and eons. But God makes us think we are the directors of the play..but are we? No one knows..maybe it is left to our improvisation, maybe it isnt. Maybe God has a fixed outcome he expects us to reach and he just tweaks us here and there directing us towards there. Or maybe there is no fixed outcome, but he just lets us wish what we want and help us achieve our wishes depending on our wants, needs and his own discretion. Or all these might be wrong! I dont know..But the irony also is that no matter what we have to continue living and go on with life.

Makes me think..what is the purpose of all this? Why do we do all this badidaata. Why is there so much competition, hatred, jealousy, spite, violence in this world? Why? Why? Why?

Why did I have to come all the way to this new country to be away from my comfort zone, my people, my family? What is the purpose of life at the end of the day? What is it that we look for?

The answer to this last question is simple..we all look for "happiness".

If all of us are looking for this one simple thing in life then why all this difference?

The only answer that comes to my mind is that everyones version of happiness is different. For someone it might mean staying at home and relaxing doing nothing forever. For someone it might mean amassing wealth and hoarding it away for generations to come. For someone else it might mean going out and helping few people out in the world and deriving some gratification out of it. It differs. Definitions vary. Means vary.

So what is right and what is wrong? I dont know..I dont think there is any "right" and "wrong" in this world. It is all subjective. Then why do human beings struggle the way they do? Why do people set out to "correct" the world? Well, that is their way to "happiness" I guess.

MAAYE....that is what all this is!!

I think that is why the Bhagvad Geeta says
"Karmanye vaadhikaaraste
Maa phaleshu kadaachana
Maa karmaphala heturbhuhu
Maa te sangostva karmani "

Another song that comes to mind is,
"Bombe aatavayya, ee brahmandavu aa devanaaduva bombe aatavayya"
"Ambujanaardhana antyavilladaatana tumbu maayeyayya, ee lokavu aa devanaaduva bombe aatavayya"

Has anyone ever thought where the world began? Where it will end? What is it that is outside our solar system..we have the Milky Way galaxy. Outside that, we have the universe..what outside the universe?? There should be something outside everything..then where does it all end???? Everything should have a beginning and an end..so where did all this begin? What was there before all this began? What will be when all this ends? Do we go round and round in loops and cycles over and over again? Have I been sitting here in this corner of the living room of my brother's place in SF typing the same thing a kazillion times before today?

Man..arent these scary thoughts? Well they are super scary to me!! I dont sit and think these thoughts daily..they come by occassionally to spook me out! Today they found their way to my blog..